Friday, December 20, 2013

All I want is closure

photo credit: David Blackwell. via photopin cc

Searching for a job post graduation can be what feels like, trying to break a wall with a plastic hammer. I think about every recent grad can agree with me that it is no easy task. It has to be the most annoying things in the world. You begin to feel like that money you spent on college could have been used to open a business or been put to use on something better. I mean do really need to spend so much money on college. I digress! 

Found a job in a place that I absolutely adore and thought that being there would ensure me another job in the same building. Oh did I mention that the job I have now is temporary so I'm still on the search. 

Yea that kind of thang where you are praying to God that you get pretty much the permanent opportunity of your dreams.

Well since being on the search I've had a couple interviews that were pretty okay. I mean I was qualified for all of them. Though, the same thing has been popping up on my mind. Where did I miss the memo that if you are not qualified for said job you don't get an email? I'm not asking for a long phone call or a visit to my home to notify me that I didn't get the job. 

Please just send me an email saying sorry, you don't qualify for this job because there is something better out there for you

I don't know, is that not a common thing to do? I need some answers. I pretty much can't deal with loose ends in anything I do. I'm the kind of girl that likes closure. Am I the only one? 

Which leads me to another topic....

That would have to be another post...

Thursday, December 19, 2013

I Woke Up Like Dis!

photo credit: DioBurto via photopin cc 

  We teach girls to shrink themselves.
To make themselves smaller.
We say to girls,
You can have ambition but not too much.
You should aim to be successful but not too successful otherwise you will threaten the man.
Because I am female,
I am expected to aspire to marriage.
I'm expected to make my life choices, always keeping in mind that marriage is the most important.
Now marriage can be a source of joy and love and mutual support,
But why do we teach girls to aspire to marriage and we don't teach boys the same.
We raise girls to see each other as competitors, 
Not for jobs or accomplishments,
Which I think can be a good thing,
but for the attention of men.
We teach girls that they cannot be sexual beings in the way that boys are.

- Chimamanda Ngozi Adiche (BEYONCÉ)

828,773 purchased in the first three days; she did that!! Beyonce done did it again. Doing my what feels like 100th listen of the new album by yah girl YoncĂ©, I was in awe at the greatness that Ms. Chimamanda was speaking on that "Flawless" track quoted above. This got me to thinking, really what's going on in our society? 

The main messages that resonated to me:
• Being "too successful" doesn't make the man look lesser.
• We should teach our young boys to aspire to marriage as we do our young girls.
• Women should be coming together and not fighting against one another. We need each other as a whole.
• Woman should not be shunned for being sexual beings.

If that doesn't say something I don't know what does. These ladies were speaking major gems on this track. Much of the talk of this, what seems to be "controversial" album by the multi-talented singer has been the talk of the world town. Some say Feminism, some say it's just Bey doing the damn thing. The SoNatural has a lot to say in her Open Letter to Black Feminists

So when you wake up remember you're flawless!! 

Monday, December 16, 2013

Dreams & Passions

I've been having multiple dreams about my grandfather and my baby cousin. I wonder what it is the Universe is trying to tell me. See my grandfather passed away about 4 years ago which honestly seems like yesterday and my baby cousin was born this year. I'm sitting here trying to figure out what it is my grandfather is trying to tell me.

I loved him without an end and he was like the father I needed in my life. He was so perfect! He was pretty much my everything. So I know he is sending me some kind of message. Just trying to understand it all.

Then I have been getting these signs to complete a project I've had on my mind for some time. It's so crazy! I'm trying to get the idea out but I feel like I keep holding myself back. You know the whole I don't have the money to get it started. Working is cool but I just need to make some more cash to share my ideas with everything. Ughh! 

Maybe I'll stumble upon some money or idk maybe I should start a crowd fund. Then again I really don't know about that crowd fund. Are people really making anything from that? I have become that person that wants to do everything on their own which probably isn't the best. Some days I'm nervous about my idea being taken. Yea, I'm working on it! 

Hoping to one day meet up with the right mentor to guide me. There aren't a lot of good mentors that I've run into. It pretty much sucks ass. 

What really makes no sense as much is that I haven't found many mentor programs for those who have just graduated and are still trying to figure out their passions. I think the 20-25 age group needs it a lot more than those younger. They are in a time when they are feeling stuck. Where do they turn?